Brittle Bones

Have you ever felt that your heart yearns for something that your flesh is so completely against? Have you ever felt the bitterness of a lively spirit fighting against broken bones? That's how I've felt in this start of 2014. I've always vowed to be real and raw with myself; not just on my blog, or with friends, but to be completely vulnerable to myself and to the Lord. I have always vowed to see the broken, even a midst the beauty. Simply because I always want to be prepared for the absolute worst in myself.

Lately, I have felt the absolute worst slowly becoming more evident. My temper is shortened, my attention has crumbled, my self-worth has lowered, my patience has lessened, my happiness has quivered. Even with those pieces of me coming to the surface, I know two things have not withered: my desire for the Lord and my joy.

Although I may be completely uneasy with myself at the moment, praying for bigger transformations and evident sanctification, I will not let my joy become darkness and I will not let my flesh beat out my spirit. The Lord makes His children strong, and I know that my bones may be brittle, but my spirit is like rock. My hopes and expectations may suffer, but my heart will never cease. My love for this world may increase, but my overall love for the Lord will never be beaten.

Within brokenness, there is always hope.